LAUGH OUT YOUR RIBS (HeaR)

They say All Work and No Fun,   Will Bore Anyone....  So enjoy a lighter moment with some H(umou)R

  

We talk about virtual world and how people can be more productive and get much more done.   Sample this.

Employee (proudly) :  I am working remotely.

Manager (thinking): I don’t think you are even remotely working

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A compensation strategist decided a new “probabilistic model” for compensation.

Soon it was time for communication session with employees

Communicator:   Friends, this year we will give merit increase by roll of dice.   If you roll 1, or 2, or 3 or 4 or 5 you get absolutely no increment this year

Enthusiastic Employee:   But what if Roll a 6 on the dice

Communicator:  Simple !! Haven’t you played LUDO before… if it is 6 you get to roll the dice once more.

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A big black dog walked into the HR Interview Room.  

Recruiter:  But what the heck are you doing here !!  Go Away

Black Dog:   Sorry, I read that you care about diversity but seems you have only humans on the team, Thought I’d give it a chance.

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Hey James,  I thought your last working day was previous Thursday.  You were supposed to have.  How come still around buddy?

James:  Gosh !! I resigned but could not clear the exit interview.  So they held me back

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Tailpiece 

Example of Progressive Series

Lies ---  More Lies ---- Dammed Lies  ----- HR Communication !!!
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Humor: Selling to the CEO

Here's something to tickle your wits !!!

A very smart sales guy was put in charge of selling the new Learning Management System developed by SmartCo.   He was a street smart sales guy so his boss asked him to sell to the CEO's directly.  

One day he went to a CEO of a big organization.  His pitch went on for about fifteen minutes about this feature and that feature and this new functionality and newer module and so on.  He saw the CEO was not getting impressed as much as he expected. 

Finally he remembered his boss telling him about the "punch lines" that help you close the sale and so he started off

"Sir,  given all else,  If you chose our LMS,  apart from all the best expert technology, features and productivity gains and benefits you will have one fantastic benefit.... you can cut down your HR team size by 50%"

Suddenly it seemed the CEO's eyes went rolling up and he seemed very excited.

"Wow" remarked the CEO... "Are you sure of the last bit on the HR Team size".

SalesMan:   "Yes Sir"

..

 CEO:  "In that case I'll buy two LMS'es  ".